all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Randomize
