the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Randomize