This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
