im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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