would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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