Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
