its not stalking. its research.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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