and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
