her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
