I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Randomize
