I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
you will always have a special place in my vag
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Randomize
