it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
