Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
