I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
You need a sexual gate keeper
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize
