dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
