Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
There's always time for handjobs
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
