Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
