Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
Randomize
