Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
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