He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
