Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize