Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
