On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Randomize
