doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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