omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
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