it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
