Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Randomize
