I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
