i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Randomize