do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
