In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
And then my night got REAL pukey
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
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