Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Randomize
