oh god the rape fog is back!
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
