some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
