There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize
