hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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