I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Michael Bay diarrhea
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Randomize
