It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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