I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize
