Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
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