Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Randomize
