Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Randomize
