Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
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