it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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