do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Randomize
