Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Randomize
