threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Randomize
