Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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