Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize
