i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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