I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
